IT IS OKAY TO CRY!

IMG-20130210-00225 Why do women cry at even the slightest thing? I guess that is one question men always ask and never seem to get the answer. A woman cries when she is happy and also when she is sad; it is just the way we were created. We are emotional beings; it does not make us inferior rather it is a reflection of how compassionate we are.

1 Samuel 1 vs. 10 “And she was in bitterness of soul, and prayed unto the LORD, and wept sore”, that verse talks about Hannah when she was praying to God for the fruit of the womb at Shiloh. I believe it is okay to cry in God’s presence after all most of us literally cry in the arms of our lover how much more in the arms of our first love. He sees every tear; he understands what your tears are trying to say even when you don’t utter a word. It does not mean that she did not believe God, she just had to let go of all the pain in her heart.

Everyone is carrying one weight, but no matter how heavy that weight might be we should not allow a bitter situation turn you into a bitter person. Sometimes you get lost, but the most important thing is to try to find yourself. Trials come to bring out the strength in you. People say Dr Stellz you appear fragile but right inside is a very strong woman. I have come to realise that I draw strength from knowing that God loves me no matter what. Sometimes when God does not calm a storm, he calms his child instead.

@_-- @Olukuewutos_wine_ There are times when words are not enough to express the way you feel, at times like this I could actually just wrap myself in the arms of God and let it all out. Being a Woman is a privilege; I still believe that women are one of the strongest creatures made by God. Woman literally go through so much pain, both physiologically (Menstrual pain) and emotionally but we always still find the strength to smile and say I am fine even when we do not feel like it.

I am a strong woman because I have learnt to smile in the midst of my tears. I would not say it is one of the easiest things to do, but knowing that his arms are always open and his shoulders are always there gives me so much courage. It is okay to cry in God’s presence, not a “Why me?” type of cry, rather a “Give me the strength to go through this” type. Somehow in the midst of all the pain, stress, confusion, I still found the strength to put down this note. Though weeping may last for the night, but surely Joy is just around the corner!

 

                                               BEAUTOPIA; WHERE BEAUTY MEETS PERFECTION!

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     I once had a conversation with some of my male friends about what they look out for in a woman and one said “The first thing I look out for is her character, then beauty comes second”, another said “I like a woman who has a gentle spirit, that is my definition of beauty”. This simply points to the fact that beauty is just not enough, there has to be something that will distinguish you from over a billion beautiful women all over the world.

It is really sad that some women get so obsessed with their beauty that they forget that one day the rose will fade off that cheek, so it is important we look beyond the “Container” to the “Contents”. Let me give this scenario, how would you feel if you walked into a phone store to buy a new phone and suddenly you see this very attractive phone which you presume to be an android phone, really sleek and in your favourite colour, only for you to discover that the phone can only make and receive phone calls, plus it only has polyphonic ringtones? I bet you would be extremely disappointed. That is how a woman who only prides in her physical beauty appears in the eyes of people.

If we are going to be women with a difference, this difference has to start from within and eventually reflect on the outside. Being beautiful is much more than applying the right make up or wearing the right clothes, here are some virtues that make a Woman appear more beautiful.

CONFIDENCE: A confident Woman is one whose boldness stems from the fact that she knows and trusts God. Her relationship with God has transformed into a strong faith in Him, however it is not possible to trust or have faith in someone you do not know intimately. Daniel 11 vs 32 “Those who know their God shall be strong and do exploits”. Every man wants a woman who is confident, and a real man knows one when he sees her.

INDEPENDENCE: This seems to be lacking in some ladies in our generation, most of us have this notion that a guy should be the one to foot all the bills, pay for our hair do, help with our internet subscription, and so on. How many ladies can boast of ever taking a guy (not necessarily your partner) out on a date and foot the bills solely? Of course it does not have to be a regular thing. Proverbs 31 vs 16 “She considers a field and buys it, out of her own earnings she plants a vineyard”, now that is a woman who is financially independent and does not have to wait for man to do “everything” for her.

LOVE: It is not enough to love people who can return that love. Proverbs 31 vs 20 “She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy”. It is almost impossible to love unconditionally if one does not have the Holyspirit as love is a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5 vs 22), love should be our default setting as Christian women. Everyone gets naturally attracted to people who are loving.

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HARDWORK: As Women,we are natural multi-taskers. We might bend but we never break. Proverbs 31 vs 27 “She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness”. It is important we learn how to make good use our time, set goals, and strive to attain our goals.

WISDOM: A wise Woman is one who knows what to say and when to say it. Someone once said “If you want knowledge go to school, if you want wisdom go on your knees”. Wisdom is the correct application of knowledge. Proverbs 31 vs 6 “She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue”. The fear of God is what guarantees wisdom, not a certificate or degree.

Charm is deceitful, beauty is vain, but a woman that fears the Lord shall be praised” Proverbs 31 vs 30. My prayer for us (ladies) is that we move from the realm of being solely concerned about our physical beauty, to a point where our beauty begins to radiate on the outside, and where it finally meets perfection; BEAUTOPIA!

You can follow us on twitter @the_pearlz, or send me an email on nwaekpestella@yahoo.com

MY LITTLE SECRET!

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Wow, she is so fresh, cool, sweet and has got style”! We often say this about women we believe have it all going for them, but the truth is that most of the time what we don’t know or see is that when she gets behind closed doors at home she hits the floor on her knees.

Every wise woman knows that so much can happen when she gets on her knees, just like that part of Nicole Mullen’s song “See I don’t know how, but there’s power when I get on my knees”.
We have so many role models in the Bible who understood the power of going on their knees, one of which is Queen Esther. Queen Esther understood the power in intercessory prayers and it was so evident in the manner at which she handled the threat against the Jews. Esther 4 verse 16 “Gather together all the jews that are present in Shushan, and fast ye for me, and neither eat nor drink 3 days, night or day; I also and my maidens will fast likewise…”

Every woman by nature was created an intercessor. An intercessor is simply someone who stands in the gap for one or more individuals in the place of prayers and supplications. Being an intercessor is a responsibility rather than a title. You don’t have to be a pastor/pastor’s wife or a member of the prayer unit in your church to be an intercessor.

Intercession goes beyond “God bless me” type of prayers to “God I bring Mr A and Miss J before you…” type of prayers. We need to learn to pray for people (You don’t have to tell them you are doing that). As an intercessor, it is important you develop the following qualities; Confidentiality, Love, Patience, and Spiritual maturity. People should be able to confide in us as women; our friends, our partners, our children, family members, etc. Don’t hug them and later gossip about them, treat issues discussed with you with confidentiality. Don’t judge them, instead show them love.

If you feel someone’s attitude or lifestyle is not right, and you have probably tried to talk to them, please pray for them. It is only God that can change a person or turn a heart of “stone” to a heart of “flesh”. Plant and water the seed, and watch God give the increase.

As women we have got something that Men don’t have; A WOMB. A woman’s womb signifies capacity, capacity to endure, love, and carry people in the place of prayer. Ladies, always remember that you are a born intercessor, and you don’t need a microphone or a pulpit to touch lives, you can make so much difference right there in that tiny corner of your room on your knees. The next time people ask you how you manage to get it all going, simply answer; Intercession is my little secret!

You can follow me on twitter @uchestellz, or send me an email on nwaekpestella@yahoo.com

PEARLS; Raising Women with a difference!

 

ImageBeing a woman still remains the best thing that has ever happened to me. I would probably still want to be one if we had the opportunity to live another life. I believe I was not created a woman by accident. I had always loved to listen to Late Pastor Bimbo Odukoya’s messages on relationship and marriage, and I would also say that she still remains one of my greatest sources of inspiration.

On the 24th April 2013 at the Daystar Women of destiny conference, Pastor Nike Adeyemi (who also happens to be one of my greatest mentors) kept saying “It’s time to stand, it’s time to make a difference”. I believe something inside of me stood up after that conference.

On my way to work on the 12th of June 2013, I just knew the hour had come. After I got back home I pondered on the scripture that talks about the virtuous woman (Proverbs 31), the phrase that struck me in that chapter of the Bible is the part that says “Her price is far above Rubies”. Suddenly the word Pearl came to my mind and I had to check it up in the dictionary, I guess what I saw wowed me even more; “The word Pearl has become a metaphor for something very rare, fine, admirable, and valuable”. I believe that was what God had in mind when he created the woman.

The group Pearls was launched officially on BBM on the 14th of June 2013, I must confess that I was really humbled by the massive support from most of the ladies and even the men. The vision of Pearls basically is to raise Godly women who will make a difference in their different fields of endeavour, even as wives, and mothers.

So far it has been a great experience sharing ideas with different women both single and married from different aspects of life, our discussions ranging from health issues, spiritual issues, career, and even personal matters.

I am entirely grateful to the giver of this vision (God), my mentors (late Pastor Bimbo Odukoya, Joyce Meyer, Faith Oyedepo, Pastor Nike Adeyemi, Sarah D Jakes), and to all my friends who have always been there from inception, I could mention names but the list is endless. I really appreciate all the men who have also supported in terms of suggestions and words of encouragement. I love you all plenty!

A special shout out to all the members of PEARLS, you ladies rock. I have a dream that one day the world will be filled with Godly women making significant impact in the Church, business world, political sector, and in their families as a whole.

I would like to make reference to verse of the scriptures I love so much; “Village life in Israel ceased, ceased until I, Deborah, arose, arose a mother in Israel” (Judges 5 verse 7).   We (PEARLS) are the Deborahs in our time and we also have chosen to arise and stand out in this generation.

We are rare, we are fine, we are admirable, we are valuable, we are PEARLS!